Choosing
by Kazima Kuwabara
Summary: This story is positively, absolutely, in no way about Kazuma Kuwabara. This story is in no way of Kuwabara having to deal with being separated from his friends. Or at least that's what Kuwabara would like. 1st pov


I don't own anything. Remember this is through first person POV. I hope you enjoy this fic!

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Currently I find myself sitting on a plane headed for New York, and this plane will be taking off in oh about…17 minutes. And as I sit here next to a woman who must have bathed in perfume to smell so badly, I find myself remembering why I'm leaving and what is really bothering me…besides the woman who smells so strongly of flowers I think I'm going to have an allergy attack.

Two weeks ago, Koenma announced that the demon, and human world would be sealed forever, so that not even my Jigan-to could cut through the barrier that separates them. I'm pretty sure this was because since Sensui every demon and their mom decided, "let's kidnap Kazuma! Yeah, that sounds like a great idea! And we'll make him cut a portal and end the world! Yay!"

Bastards.

Point is, I'm sure Urameshi, Koenma and everyone else involved must have been sick of helping me out and that's why Koenma dropped a bomb on our little happy quartet.

"Hiei, Kurama, Yusuke…You're going to have to decide which realm to stay in, human or demon…" Koenma trailed off, and without meeting my eye said, "Yukina has already departed for demon world." Hearing that hurt...Yukina leaving was rough, but Kurama, Hiei, and Yusuke...was this hell? There was this long silence, and I could feel my friends' secret glances watching me for signs of distress. But I'm an excellent actor-hell I convince a stadium of people, and my best friend I was killed once. So I grinned turned to my friends and trying to sound goofy and stupid, I blurted, "Damn guys! I'm going to miss you!"

As I laughed Urameshi frowned and muttered, "Stupid! We haven't made our decision yet!"

"You might as well go…I mean I accepted that whole scholarship for America an' all. I mean...we all have our own lives to leave," I said rubbing my nose and blinking at my best friend as if I really didn't care if he left me behind.

Alone.

Again.

"I mean…Urameshi you're a demon. You belong in demon world where there are people like you who you can fight. Hell one day I swear, I'm going to beat you, even if it's in the afterlife, but I can't keep your fighting spirit pleased. You gotta go to demon world so you can you know…keep that stupid grin on your face."

After my little speech there was a long silence…and deep down I was hoping I'd be rebuked.

But Hiei shrugged muttering, "Demon world is my home. I'm going back." Kurama quietly agreed…and Urameshi placed a hand on my arm. I knew his answer then.

Laughing a little bit I spouted, "Well Urameshi, since you helped me pack I guess it's my turn eh?"

No one laughed or answered me.

I went home that night-feeling my throat clamped shut because it all was too damn much. My eyes burned, and my hands were shaking and I just felt sick all over. My sister came out of the kitchen staring at me, and I knew she knew. She approached me wrapping her arms around me and I hugged her tight and just cried. She held me shushing me, and before I could even ask her, she promised me, "I won't tell your friends. I'm so sorry Kazu."

I slumped off to bed skipping dinner; my stomach was too tight for food anyhow. I collapsed and just slept the night and most of the day away. The last two weeks with my friends were the worst. Conversations were short, to the point, and awkwardly filled with all sorts of heavy tension that you just couldn't put a name too.

The last day, the day of my departure and my pals' as well I was driving Urameshi and his stuff to Genkai's shrine.

"This fucking blows," Yusuke suddenly said giving a name to the painful departure. I shrugged glancing over at him in the passenger seat, puu sitting in his arms pouting. I turned my eyes back on the road and said, "Well…we were going to be separated anyway."

"Yeah but You were just going to another country for school. I'd only have to way for you for two years…I mean damn Kuwabara you waited for **me** for _three years_ when I was doing that Makai tournament!" Yusuke said angrily punctuating his words by jabbing his finger in his palm.

Shrugging again because I couldn't think of what to say I watched the red light waiting for it to turn green.

And then like vomit, my secret desire since I heard this horrible news, I just spurted out, "I wish I could withstand the miasma in the demon world atmosphere and come with you guys. I wish I was a demon so I could follow you all. I don't even want to go to America, but staying here would just be too Goddamn painful."

I'm still kicking myself for saying that aloud.

Urameshi stared at me as I gripped the steering wheel so tight my knuckles turned right. He was about to say something when the driver behind me starting cussing and shouting at me to move my ass because the light was green.

I took off flipping the guy the bird, and to try and break the silence I whined, "Jesus can't two guys have a man to man discussion about shit that's important nowadays?"

"Why didn't you say anything Kuwabara?" Urameshi asked voice low and filled with concern.

"Urameshi…" I sighed resting my head back against the driver's seat, "I didn't mean to say that at all. I wanted to see you guys off with a smile, and not let you all know just how damn sorry I am for not being a demon. Just how lonely I'm going to be without you. How fucking torn up I am inside…it's not something you say to your friends when they're leaving you know?!" My voice had gotten louder and now that I was speaking, I just couldn't shut up. "Since junior high…you guys have been…well dammit the most important things in my life. And even when you're gone no one will be able to replace ya'll, hell I'm even going to miss that punk Hiei! I've fought with you all, cried with you, almost died for you guys! My whole life revolves around you guys-I even love you guys more then my sister, but now…I just can't follow you all anymore!"

I slammed my hands on the wheel and wrenched it to the left startling both Puu and Urameshi. I parked and just continued venting what had been festering in me like a painful boil, "And it's just because of **_one_** stupid thing. I'm human and you guys aren't! It's just not…I mean come on! Have I, or have I not saved the world, or at least Japan, what…three fucking times? Don't I get…get like a wish or something, or a reward? And fuck it if this is gay, or wussy, or girly-I just don't care anymore…but without you guys my life is going to be meaningless and sad. And I really, really-for the first time in my life since I met you guys-wish I was a demon so I wouldn't have to go back to being alone again."

And then I cried.

But I'd like to see you not cry when you're best friend, someone you loved like a brother was leaving you.

Urameshi was shocked into silence, but Puu flew up and landed on my shoulder wrapping his ears around my face, blanketing my eyes and cried with me. Being as Puu is a representation of Urameshi's soul I guess that's how Urameshi was feeling inside,knowing Urameshi he just couldn't let Kuwabara see him weak. Urameshi in all the time I know him...has a real hard time letting his feelings out.

When I collected myself, I plucked Puu off and plopped him in Urameshi's lap, and in silence we drove to the shrine, where Hiei, Kurama, and Koenma were waiting for us. I got out of my car leaving the engine running because I couldn't stay to see them go. I had a plain to catch.

I held out my hand for Hiei and when he took it set my other hand on his and looked him right in the eye, "I'm going to miss fighting with you."

Hiei nodded looking grimmer then normal and held my hand for a long moment before pulling it away. He looked at his hand with a serious expression before pulling his hand away and shoving it in his pocket. The way he acted said more then he could ever say to me.

Kurama clapped a hand on my shoulder and with a sad smiled said, "I'm going to miss you Kazuma. Every day…and believe me foxes live a long time…every day until I die I'm going to miss you my very loyal friend."

I grinned a goofy grin and nodded, "Yeah me too."

Then I looked at my best friend. At the same moment we embraced and I heard him take a sharp intake of breath. We hugged each other, and just squeezed the life out of one another, whether it was intentional or not. And then I shoved Urameshi off because I knew if I held on any longer I'd start crying again, and I wasn't about to let Hiei see that. I turned and without looking back I peeled out of there leaving skid marks on the road.

And here I am…about to head for New York with…thirty-six seconds left before my plane takes off…

And I've just realized I've made a horrible, terrible mistake.

I don't belong in America, or in that college, or on this plain…or in Japan. Dammit nothing's stopped me before in helping my buds, why the hell am I sitting here about to run away from it all?! I'm Kazuma Kuwabara! I don't run away!

**3RD POV**

Kuwabara's face twisted in mortification and shock as he realized the plain was already moving. He reached for his belt buckle but he was lucky to have still been in his seat belt, because just then the plain jolted and tipped forward, the plain now at a slant. Kuwabara grimaced as his belt buckle tightened on his waist as it did its job of keeping him in his seat. People gasped and screamed and a panicked voice came over the intercom, "T-this is your captain speaking but…but it seems one of our wheels was…taken off!"

The woman next to Kuwabara started screaming and he looked at her seeing she was pointing out the window next to him. Kuwabara turned his mind screaming, 'No way…no way…it can't be. It's not possible. No way…no fucking way…are my friends…no way did they…'

All thought stopped as Kuwabara looked outside the window and saw Yusuke's smug arrogant face looking at him as he sat perched on the wing. He smiled and then Yusuke turned around waving someone up, and there was Hiei.

"No fucking way!" Kuwabara managed to rasp, only to have to jerk away from the wall of the plain as Hiei's sword was thrust through the thin metal. The woman next to Kuwabara screamed and fainted and Kuwabara couldn't help but feel relieved that the lady tilted away from him, taking some of that painful perfume with her. People were screaming and telling Kuwabara to get away but…

Kuwabara just laughed.

"Hell…I don't think I could get away if I wanted," Kuwabara laughed under his breath as Hiei cut a good hole in the side of the plane, and both he and Yusuke pried the metal off chunking it down on the runway. Yusuke seized Kuwabara by the front of his shirt, and punched Kuwabara in the stomach.

"That…was…unexp…ected…" Kuwabara wheezed eyes closed before he doubled over right onto Yusuke's shoulder. Yusuke hauled Kuwabara out of the plane and saluted the frightened passengers.

"You guys might want to get your money back," Yusuke advised cheekily before jumping from the wing, joining Kurama and Hiei at the runway, Kurama standing smugly on one of the wheels of the plane that appeared to have been snapped off by large thick thorny vines. And though Kuwabara protested (though it was very quiet because he was still recovering from a punched solar plexus) that he didn't want to be carried by Yusuke, said dark haired teen ignored him and before Kuwabara knew it, he was dropped rather roughly on Genkai's shrine steps.

"Listen here Kuwabara, next time you want something, just fucking say it. Don't bottle it inside, it ain't healthy!"

"Isn't healthy Yusuke," Kurama quietly corrected.

"Point is," Yusuke said shooting Kurama a, "shut-the-hell-up," look, "You want to come with us-so come with us! We left you behind once already…and well…"

"Even I regretted it," Hiei said speaking up but looking to the left instead of looking at Kuwabara.

"So…you said you couldn't do without us, so…well…I can't either…" Yusuke said looking a little bashful, and then his expression becoming quite serious, and even timid, he said, "We'll find a way for you to stay with us in demon world. Whether that be you becoming a demon, or us bullying Koenma into giving you a loophole somehow-"

"Beating him into giving Kuwabara a way into demon world sounds fine with me," Hiei said smirking, still refusing to look at Kuwabara.

Finally Kuwabara grinned and laughed until her felt tears streaming down his face, "Okay…" He finally said heaving a sigh, "Okay…but you know…we left all my stuff on that plane back there."

All eyes were on him and Yusuke held out a hand and smiled, "Well in demon world we'll just buy you more shit."

Kuwabara took Yusuke's hand and got back on his feet eyes fixed on his best friend, "What you have shopping malls in demon world?"

"Does that surprise you Kazuma?" Kurama asked grinning at Kuwabara.

"Well with how Hiei talks demon world sounds like it's too good for something like that!" Kuwabara chided.

Hiei snorted, "Demon world is gold compared to the shit hole you call Earth."

Kuwabara rolled his eyes, "I don't insult your home-"

Hiei suddenly interrupted Kuwabara, "Your home. Demon world is going to be your home too Kuwabara...your home with us."

Everyone looked at Hiei, and then to Kuwabara, and Kuwabara took in a deep breath and let it all out in a cleansing sigh.

"Right…home with you guys."

End


End file.
